I know I should have blogged last night, but I guess I was rather tired out with everything that happened. And trust me, a lot happened. Firstly, HAPPY BIRTHDAY SYAM AKKA!!! I love u lots! I hope you had a cool time with Uncle Ranjit and Rina Akka. I will see you tonight and we'll have a smashing time kayz! And then of course I had the academic event of the day, my very first counseling session. It was a little awkward at first as I felt really uncomfortable with talking to a complete stranger about my life and all. But after a while I sort of eased up and took Karen (my counselor) as a friend rather than a professional and sharing things with her become much easier.
I suppose being the person I am (the low self-esteem one) made it a little difficult to deal with certain things. For one I left out the body image concepts that Jill later pointed out (HATE JILL!!! :P ) But I guess, its called baby steps. BIG SMILES! Counseling was good for me. I felt good getting a lot of things off my chest and it felt good to be understood. Doesn't make you feel like such a loser at any rate! HEE!! =)
And the next thing we did was to go to KL to get the insurance thingy sorted out. Thank god we found the place!! After circling the whole of the city we found the damned building crouching in a corner somewhere. Sheesh! And once that was sorted out we made our way back to college to have a bite to eat! YAYYY ALI MAJU MIHUN GORENG! hahaha! the had the little fried thingies that Jill and I love soooo muchiez! If only Adie was there, it would have been perfect! Of course Gling mentioned that we were getting loadz of attention coz I was wearing a booby-dress! (full of utter nonsense! we always get the same service!) But I did get some really annoying glances ler... God, I'm SO going back to big loose T-shirts! Its like being raped with my clothes on! DEESGUSTEENG!
So the day ended pretty much that way except of course for one leetle detail I left out...
* messaged me good night and I deleted it. There. I said and did it. It was really painful listening to the things Jill and Sar both said to me. But moreover I had further reinforcement from my session yesterday as I learnt that I tend to give myself waaaay too little credit. I tend to think I don't deserve the best for myself as I don't think I am worthy of the best. Well, counseling isn't magic and I still do believe that but maybe, juz maybe, I deserve a little more than what I'm getting. All I ever want is to know that someone out there can accept me for me and love me unconditionally. I don't need anything else and I'm willing to compromise a lot for that simple affection. But if someone can't do that for me then he shouldn't be and isn't worth my time. It hurts a lot to have to deal with reality itself but I guess no pain no gain rite?
Ah well, hope so at least!!
Loveeeeeeeeeeeezzzzz!!!!
eh you're indian! Go find out what the little fried things are called already!!!
And I know you love me. =)
*pat pat*
Proud of you!
EEE!! RACISM LOR! hee hee hee! k k! Next project, find out what fried thingies are! ;)
proud of me too! hehehee!